Maybe you’re right, maybe I’ll never amount to anything. I might spend my entire life writing these poems and essays and novels and never get a single one published. It’s likely that the only people who will ever read my words are people who follow my tiny blog. I’ll never get paid for writing, and I’ll never get famous. My parents may never respect my dream of being an author, and my friends may ridicule me for wasting my weekends storyboarding the next chapter of the book I’ll never, ever finish instead of spending some time in the Sun. I might even look back and regret ever starting down this path of winding words, but that doesn’t matter. I want to be a writer. I want to put my soul into something, because I’ve been inspired by those who have written before me. Every book, every poem or screenplay or short story I have ever read lives inside of me. I can feel the passion coming from every sentence, and it’s the most wonderful feeling in the world, to read the soul of another person. I want to give my fair share to the world, and not because I feel I owe this world anything. I want to give myself away on these pages because it’s what I want to do; I just want to pour my heart out in the best way that I can, and that means pen to paper, keystrokes to LCD monitor, fancy Eagle feather quill to authentic, hand crafted, medieval scrolls!
I let you tapper my dream of writing until the only thing left was a point so fine it would break the second I tried to put any weight into my words. I let you whittle me away, and that was my mistake. I paid for it…I’m still paying for it, every day, BUT, I also didn’t give you everything. Brittle though it may be, I still have my own pen, so I can write my own story. It might not last very long, but so long as I still have it, I won’t give up. I’m going to keep going, until I can’t go any further. Even if I go nowhere with my writing, I’m still going to write, and I’m going to share it to my blog, and I’m going to fill journal after journal with every story that pops into my head.
So maybe you’re right, but maybe you’re also 100% wrong. I have already amounted to something. It might be a small something in a niche corner of the literary world, but I am something, and nobody can take that away.
just keep walking and you will get there 🙂
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Don’t stop writing. That spark is in you, and it is precious. Maybe you won’t wait as long as me to discover (in my 40’s) that it is actually possible to make money through my writing. Not enough to replace a full-time income (yet) but I believe the practice of writing and reflecting is never wasted. It’s like a muscle that you keep strong by exercising. Feed it well, and it may someday surprise you.
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I’ve been making submissions to journals and entering contests, but had no luck. But today I learned I’ll finally get something published. It’ll be in a small online publication, but after being rejected dozens of times, it felt wonderful. I’m not expecting things to suddenly change, but i now know at least one thing I wrote was good enough, so I’ll just have to keep on keeping on! And hearing back from other people on WordPress is always encouraging as well!
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Wow! That is really exciting. Rejections are to be expected. All the famous authors have piles of them. The only difference between them and the others is that they did not give up. I am so happy to hear you have gotten this acceptance. Keep working at it, stay true to yourself and your craft. We need your work in the world.
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