I had relationships before you, told other people “I love you”, and I don’t think I was lying to them, at least until I heard you whisper those words into my ear.
I can’t resist the urge to break. It’s almost like a need, a physical itch that demands I scratch it with a freshly sharpened pocket knife. I hate this feeling. I am filled up with things and stuff instead of love and warmth, and it hurts. I want to cry. Every day I want to … Continue reading “I’m failing. Everything that I am; body, mind, spirit, and all the other shit in between, I am a failure.”
I don’t know how you feel about me; You never say what’s on your mind. One day your all smiles and roses And the next you treat me like a waste of time. You loved me in the morning But by Noon, you were nowhere to be found And I’m sure before I go to … Continue reading “It only took me a few seconds to realize my mistake, but by then the damage had already been done, and I lost more of myself to a stranger..”
I’ll hold out for tonight, The same as every night, But I swear this time tomorrow I’ll be better, I’ll be whole. It’s not that I enjoy lying But it’s the only thing I own; My words are still my words, Even if they have no home. So while everything is burning I’ll keep pretending … Continue reading I want to hurt me, to prove that you were nothing special. I want you to see my scars, so I can scream “See?! I don’t need you to break me! I can do it just fine all alone!”
I’ve felt the weight of broken men against my chest. I’ve watched as they cried until they had nothing left, collapsing into my arms and letting me guide them into a rocky slumber. I’ve steadied the shaking hands of terrified children. They were small, but the fear in their eyes was big, and it threatened … Continue reading “Heroes come in all shapes and sizes. Most will fight to selflessly serve others, but there are also heroes who only help others because they think that will somehow save themselves.”
Sleeping in is a luxury far removed from my reality. My bed still calls to me every morning, giving the utmost effort to hold me down. But this isn’t an act of kinship with my sheets, rather my sheets are hellbent on smothering me into nothingness. I’m laying facedown, surrounded in a sea of tumbling … Continue reading “I know I’m fucked up, because I’d rather suffer in your shadow than try and make it in this world without you…”
“You say that it hurts to be alone, but you are the one pushing aside your phone when it lights up, ignoring every invite from friends and family to go out or come over. You aren’t making an effort, so can you really say that being alone hurts?” ~It’s not being alone that hurts. I … Continue reading I promised you shelter, but I just realized my heart is full of holes. So maybe I was just using you to plug them up, to make me feel whole…