Tag: losing

“A night without liquor, mistakes made in poor lighting, and the numbing taste of a strangers lips would do me a world of good. If only I knew how to accept anything good..”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

Coiled around every kiss is the taste of a temporary love. It’s a bitter pill to swallow, but we’ve all forced ourselves to stomach worse things than this, in the name of desire. Nobody enjoys a burning esophagus, nor the rancid taste of stomach acid that accompanies every exhale. A goodnight kiss has been replaced … Continue reading “A night without liquor, mistakes made in poor lighting, and the numbing taste of a strangers lips would do me a world of good. If only I knew how to accept anything good..”

Days turned to weeks, and now it’s been months; exactly 96 days I’ve been sober. But that’s left my mind with nothing but time to wonder about you and me…so I’m sober, but I’m suffocating, trying to accept a me without you…

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

Now I remember your face The name you remind me of, so fake This bitter pill, just a bit overkill But theater has its place’s We have come to a fork in the middle of this road Damnit, who put this here? Blocking my way, making it harder to say What I need to Well … Continue reading Days turned to weeks, and now it’s been months; exactly 96 days I’ve been sober. But that’s left my mind with nothing but time to wonder about you and me…so I’m sober, but I’m suffocating, trying to accept a me without you…

“It only took me a few seconds to realize my mistake, but by then the damage had already been done, and I lost more of myself to a stranger..”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

I don’t know how you feel about me; You never say what’s on your mind. One day your all smiles and roses And the next you treat me like a waste of time. You loved me in the morning But by Noon, you were nowhere to be found And I’m sure before I go to … Continue reading “It only took me a few seconds to realize my mistake, but by then the damage had already been done, and I lost more of myself to a stranger..”

Rainy days are my favorite days, because in the rain I can believe in things like a clean start or second chances.

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

I waited for you in April, but as the rain came and went, you never revealed yourself to me.  I stayed there, and I’m still here, unable to rise up and enjoy the summer sun. And as this autumn fades into blinding snow, you are often the only thing on my mind. I’m still waiting … Continue reading Rainy days are my favorite days, because in the rain I can believe in things like a clean start or second chances.

I want to hurt me, to prove that you were nothing special. I want you to see my scars, so I can scream “See?! I don’t need you to break me! I can do it just fine all alone!”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

I’ll hold out for tonight, The same as every night, But I swear this time tomorrow I’ll be better, I’ll be whole. It’s not that I enjoy lying But it’s the only thing I own; My words are still my words, Even if they have no home. So while everything is burning I’ll keep pretending … Continue reading I want to hurt me, to prove that you were nothing special. I want you to see my scars, so I can scream “See?! I don’t need you to break me! I can do it just fine all alone!”

Years may pass, but the Sun hasn’t changed; It’s the same every May, and so is the pain.

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

Speak to me, on bended knee! "O sweet dreams, my dreary queen!" Sail away on those ships of yours Past the end, over the floors Of a raging Ocean, with waves as tall As my clouds, the love that won’t fall… ~My words on paper mean nothing at all, for in a moment of rage … Continue reading Years may pass, but the Sun hasn’t changed; It’s the same every May, and so is the pain.

“And it’s all the same, just different games… so maybe I am the one to blame…”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

How else can I describe this without being redundant? My stomach is tied in knots, spilling out through the holes in my humanity, leaving an empty pit at my center of gravity. The room isn’t spinning, but nothing is stationary. It’s all subtle shifts; light reflecting off curved surfaces, my white wallpaper peeled back to … Continue reading “And it’s all the same, just different games… so maybe I am the one to blame…”

“Etch these words into my skin so I may never forget; I steal my light as a paper moon, only glowing after sunset.”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

He creeps into your mind At the most inopportune times, Stealing away precious brain cells And holding in the CO2 That you’ve built up in your veins. Whatever warmth you had Seeps out through your open chest, Replacing the justified anger With docile tones And heavy shakes. You feel leaks, tiny pin pricks, Along all … Continue reading “Etch these words into my skin so I may never forget; I steal my light as a paper moon, only glowing after sunset.”

I’m less than garbage, less than dirt. The lowest of the low…I’m truly the definition of a scummy, wasted, worthless existence.

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ 1 Comment

~I’m sorry Mom~ You raised me with nothing but love and care. You were so small, but I haven’t met anybody who can match your strength. A day never went by where I didn’t get at least one hug from you. But I stole something from you. With every hug, I was betraying your trust … Continue reading I’m less than garbage, less than dirt. The lowest of the low…I’m truly the definition of a scummy, wasted, worthless existence.

“My love remains an unfurled bud, a future with a diametric fate; I’ll blossom in the Spring, or else suffer through another winter alone.”

~ taylorfinn0810 ~ Leave a comment

You aren’t here. But somehow, Even when I can’t feel you, I am guided by you. I know what you are; Just a false light, A fleeting sight, But my eyes Catch your fire And my heart takes over; I can’t move forward Without you. My world remains opaque, Where nothing exists But the indent … Continue reading “My love remains an unfurled bud, a future with a diametric fate; I’ll blossom in the Spring, or else suffer through another winter alone.”