I was so caught up in the rush, I didn’t bother to think about it at all. I wanted to ride this wave, to live in the fast lane, to never lose the wind blowing through my hair. I wanted it all so badly...that I never noticed. Well, more like I refused to acknowledge the … Continue reading August has arrived, and with it a more relaxed mood for my self reflections.
You don’t have to be afraid, My sweet primrose, Of the coming storm. The clouds are rolling in, And in that gray wave The Lions of the sky reign. Their manes, majestic ash, With roars born From a clash of light Fighting to find solid ground. Look past the lightning, And listen for the moments … Continue reading “The wind is howling, turning raindrops into bristling needles on my arms, and in that familiar pain I can almost remember where the scars all started.”
It’s 85 degrees outside, and the air in this old office isn’t what you’d call “top notch”, so my shirt is sticking to my chair, and my shirt sleeve is stained with forehead sweat. I walked in, sat down, and the heat made me sick within minutes. I’ve been up to empty my guts 3 … Continue reading I don’t know why I bother.
They say the sky wasn’t always gray; There used to be a white light, A star close enough to touch, But we wasted it’s warmth. We let that fire burn the air, Tinge our shoulders bronze, Feed our flower petals And guide us towards tomorrow. It shared everything, expecting nothing. So what did … Continue reading “The scales are tipped in my favor, but I’m too afraid to make a bet…27 years, and I’m still unable to bet on me…”
I hope for things that have yet to come, and I wish I could go back and change everything. I’m nothing but a mess of what ifs, weighed down by a mountain of could have beens, and underneath it all is nothing but an ugly husk of questionable, molting moralities. Hoping is bullshit. It’s what … Continue reading The difference between a hope and a wish
The Summer flickers into the year with lingering regrets; A medley of melted marshmallows and perfume laced bug sprays. It’s not a storm like the Spring, raging in, forcing growth and change, no. Summer stumbles with no direction, as if lost in all this sunlight, As if the added hours of daytime and sweltering drafts … Continue reading I’ve stretched out my soul to widen my shadow, the only part of me that seems to understand how much of a fool God must be for creating this bullshit.
“People can break into pieces, and every single one of those pieces still has enough of us to feel, enough of us to love, enough of us to break again...We may only have 1 life to live, but in that life, a person can die more than once.” I tried to wash this all away … Continue reading It’s not Hell on Earth, it’s just Hell.
I think it started back when I entered High School, and I would spend entire nights just staring at my arms, wishing there was some sort of magical lotion or bandage that could erase all these obviously self-inflicted cuts. I would be so ashamed, I would write myself an angry letter, boldly declaring I would … Continue reading I expected him to change, because he said he would change, and I am in the habit of believing bad people when they tell me they’ll do something.
I pluck away at my feathers And scatter them to sandy riverbanks. Some find a home in stray branches While others fall only to drown. My hope is that you will see me Before both of my wings are gone. I’m giving up my open skies To walk the same Earth as you. But … Continue reading Her shadows are shorter now, seemingly eaten up by the clouds. I know she’s still here on the ground, but the more I search, the more it feels like she doesn’t want to be found.
Did her fire inspire you to change? Did her words make an impact, Driving you towards that cliff, Closer and closer to the edge, Beckoning you to trust that she Would be the wings you longed for? You wished for daring adventure, That breathless sensation Of fear mixed with desire, That chemical reaction People … Continue reading I have my own wings, but still relied on you to carry me. Even when it’s all handed to me on a silver platter, I’ll find a way to fail.”
That little light from your lampshade 